Teach Turn-Taking from an Early Age

Ever feel like you’re starring in a never-ending episode of 'Who Gets the Red Crayon?' Welcome to the world of toddler turn-taking, where sharing is a four-letter word and every game is a full-contact sport. If you’ve ever negotiated a ceasefire over a plastic spoon, this might just be the sanity-saving strategy you need. Spoiler: it involves fewer tears (yours and theirs) and more giggles… eventually.

Teaching turn-taking isn’t just about avoiding toy-related brawls (though, bonus!). It actually wires your kid’s brain for patience, empathy, and self-control. Every time they wait, their little prefrontal cortex does a happy dance, building the skills they’ll need for friendships, school, and not losing it in line at the ice cream truck.

How to do it

Start with super-short, simple games—think rolling a ball back and forth or taking turns making silly animal noises.

Narrate what’s happening as you play. For example: “Now it’s your turn, now it’s mine!”

Use timers or songs to make waiting fun (or at least less like watching paint dry).

Praise every attempt, even if it’s just a half-second pause before the next grab.

And remember:

  • Consistency is key.
  • Keep your sense of humor, even when the “turns” last exactly 0.3 seconds.

When you notice your child reaching for a toy that someone else is using.

Say, 'Let’s take turns!' and model handing the toy back and forth once.
Give your child a high-five and say, 'Great turn-taking!' (and mentally high-five yourself for surviving another round).
Place a favorite turn-taking game (like a simple board game or ball) in a visible, easy-to-reach spot.

During snack time when your child wants the first bite.

Announce, 'It’s your turn for a bite, now it’s my turn!'
Do a silly cheer or wiggle together after each 'turn.'
Download a fun, turn-based kids’ app or set up a playlist of 'your turn, my turn' songs.

When siblings or friends start to argue over a toy.

Set the timer for one minute and say, 'When the timer dings, it’s your turn!'
Let the child ring the timer bell or press the button, making them feel like the official turn-taking referee.
Set a kitchen timer in a spot your child can see and reach.