Cultivate a Growth Mindset About Your Parenting Abilities

Ever feel like you’re auditioning for a role you didn’t actually read for? Welcome to parenting, where everyone else’s highlight reel makes you wonder if you’re even in the right movie. But plot twist: it turns out you can actually get better at this gig (who knew?). If you’re tired of feeling like the world’s worst intern in your own house, let’s talk about believing you can level up—one diaper disaster at a time.

Believing you can improve literally rewires your brain—hello, neuroplasticity! For parents, this means less stress and more confidence; for kids, it’s a front-row seat to resilience in action. When you model learning from mistakes, your child learns it’s okay to mess up and try again (instead of melting down over spilled juice or, you know, life). Everyone’s brains get a little more flexible, and your home gets a lot less tense.

How to do it

Step 1:
Catch yourself when you think, “I’m just not good at this.” Pause, and add “yet.” Remind yourself that growth takes time and effort.

Step 2:
Treat every parenting fail (for example, the time you put the diaper on backwards) as a learning moment, not a permanent label. Mistakes are opportunities to improve, not evidence that you can’t succeed.

Step 3:
Say out loud what you’re working on. Kids love seeing you try and learn alongside them. This models a growth mindset and encourages them to do the same.

Step 4:
Celebrate tiny wins, like remembering where you put the wipes. Small victories matter and help build your confidence.

Rinse, repeat, and maybe keep a secret stash of chocolate for the hard days.

Key Tips:

  • Pause negative self-talk and reframe it with “yet.”
  • View mistakes as chances to learn, not as failures.
  • Be open about your efforts and progress with your kids.
  • Recognize and celebrate small successes.
  • Take care of yourself—sometimes a little treat goes a long way!

Every morning when you brush your teeth.

Say one thing you learned (or survived) yesterday as a parent.
Do your best superhero pose in the mirror—cape optional, confidence mandatory.
Stick a Post-it note on your bathroom mirror with the phrase 'Learning Dad in Progress.'

After your kid goes to bed (or after they finally stop yelling about broccoli).

Type one small thing you handled better today than last week.
Give yourself a silent high-five or treat yourself to a victory sip of your favorite drink.
Save a note on your phone labeled 'Parenting Wins.'

While sitting down for a meal together.

Share one parenting mistake and what you learned from it.
Laugh about it together—bonus points if your kid joins in with their own story.
Tell your partner or co-parent you want to swap 'learning moments' at dinner.