Spend Quality One-on-One Time Regularly

Ever feel like you’re running a taxi service for tiny humans who don’t tip? Or that you’ve spent more time with your phone than your kid this week? This is your nudge to press pause on the endless to-do list and just hang out, one-on-one, with your mini-me—even if it’s five minutes hiding from laundry together. Spoiler: nobody’s ever regretted the extra snuggle or silly face contest.

Regular one-on-one time boosts your child’s self-esteem and sense of security—like emotional bubble wrap. It literally wires their brain for connection, trust, and resilience, and gives you both a much-needed oxytocin boost (that’s the cuddle hormone, not a new laundry detergent). For you, it’s a break from referee duty and a reminder that, hey, this little human actually thinks you’re pretty awesome.

How to do it

  • Choose a time when both you and your child are reasonably awake and not hungry. This helps set a positive tone for your time together.

  • Let your child pick the activity—even if it means pretending to be a pancake or something equally imaginative. Giving them control makes the experience more meaningful.

  • Remove all distractions. Put away your phone and other devices, unless you’re using them together for a fun activity (like seeing who can make the silliest selfie).

  • Follow your child’s lead. Ask questions and genuinely listen to their answers, even if the conversation turns to dinosaurs or the mysterious evil of socks.

  • Finish your time together with a gesture of connection, such as a hug, high-five, or secret handshake.

  • Try to repeat this process as often as possible, while also being mindful of your own limits.

Tips:

  • Flexibility is key—sometimes plans change, and that’s okay.
  • Even short moments of focused attention can make a big difference.
  • Celebrate the little things and enjoy the silliness.

When you finish cleaning up after dinner (or at least, when you pretend you’re done).

Turn to your child and say, 'Hey, want to do something just us for five minutes?'
Give yourself a mental gold star and snap a silly selfie together—future you will thank you.
Make a list of five quick activities your child loves (think: dance party, drawing, pillow fort, storytime, or just lying on the floor staring at the ceiling).

When you hang up your coat after coming home from work or errands.

Sit down next to your child and ask, 'What’s one thing you want to do with just me right now?'
Do a goofy victory dance—even if it’s just in your head.
Set a recurring calendar reminder titled 'Mini Me Time' at a time that usually works.

When you notice your child is starting to melt down or get clingy.

Pull out the game and say, 'Let’s play one quick round, just us.'
Exchange a secret handshake or invent a new one on the spot—bonus points for sound effects.
Stash a favorite board game or deck of cards somewhere easy to grab.